Your friend was driving when the accident happened. Or your sister. Or your spouse. They caused the crash, and now you're seriously injured. Filing a claim feels like a betrayal—but not filing means you're left with mounting medical bills. Here's what you need to understand about claims against people you care about.
You're Claiming Against Insurance, Not Your Friend
This is the most important thing to understand: when you file a claim, you're not suing your friend personally—you're filing against their insurance policy.
Your friend won't write you a check. They won't lose their house. Their insurance company will pay your claim, up to their policy limits. This is exactly what insurance is for.
Your friend might see slightly higher premiums, but they would have faced that increase anyway once the accident was reported—regardless of whether you filed a claim.
Why You Should File a Claim
Consider the reality of not filing:
- Your medical bills are real and must be paid somehow
- Your lost wages won't pay themselves
- Your own health insurance may require you to pursue liable parties
- Serious injuries may require ongoing care for years
- Your friend has insurance precisely for this situation
Not filing a legitimate claim doesn't help your friend—it only hurts you.
How to Handle It with Your Friend
An honest conversation helps preserve the relationship:
Explain how insurance works. Many people don't understand that you're filing against the insurance company, not demanding money from them personally.
Be clear you're not trying to hurt them. You can say something like: "I need to file an insurance claim for my medical bills. This won't cost you anything out of pocket—it's what your insurance is for."
Most friends and family understand once they realize you're not attacking them or trying to take their money.
What If They Get Upset?
Some people may still feel hurt. Consider:
- They may feel guilty about injuring you
- They might not understand how insurance claims work
- They may worry about their premiums or insurability
A true friend would want you to be compensated for injuries they caused. If someone expects you to absorb thousands in medical bills to spare their feelings, that's worth examining.
The Legal Reality
Even if you don't want to file, external factors may require it:
Your health insurance company may demand it. Many policies include subrogation rights—they can require you to pursue the liable party to recover what they paid for your care.
Medicaid and Medicare require it. Government insurance programs typically require you to pursue responsible parties.
Workers' comp may require it if the accident happened during work-related travel.
When the At-Fault Person Is Your Spouse
Spousal claims have additional complications:
- Some states have interspousal immunity that limits claims between spouses
- Some insurance policies exclude household members from liability coverage
- Community property states create additional complexities
- You may effectively share the insurance policy being claimed against
Check your policy and state law carefully. An attorney can help navigate these issues.
When the At-Fault Person Is Your Child
If your adult child was driving your car or their own:
- Their insurance (or yours, if they were driving your car) applies
- The same insurance-pays principle applies
- Some policies exclude family members—check the language
What If Their Insurance Isn't Enough?
If your friend has minimum coverage and your damages exceed their limits:
- Their insurance pays up to the policy limit
- Your underinsured motorist coverage may pay the difference
- You generally cannot pursue your friend personally for the excess without taking assets they own, which would truly damage the relationship
Most attorneys won't pursue individuals beyond their insurance coverage unless they have significant assets.
Settlement Negotiations
Even when the at-fault driver is a friend:
- The insurance company still handles negotiations
- They may still try to minimize your payout
- Your friend has no control over settlement decisions
- The claim proceeds like any other insurance claim
Litigation If Necessary
If the insurance company won't settle fairly, you may need to file a lawsuit. This means:
- Technically naming your friend as a defendant
- But the insurance company defends and pays
- Your friend likely won't even attend court proceedings
- It's still the insurance company you're really fighting
Conclusion
Filing a claim against a friend or family member feels uncomfortable, but it's how insurance is designed to work. Your friend pays premiums so their insurance covers situations exactly like this. Not filing means you bear the financial burden of their mistake—which isn't fair to you and isn't what they would want if they understood the situation. Have an honest conversation, explain how insurance works, and take care of yourself.